I believe I have become more and more cynical this last month and definitely these last two weeks. In these last two weeks, even this last week, my life has changed dramatically from what it was before. And it will continue to change. I hate change.
Ask anyone. I have said "I hate change" so many times. And yet, those times when things change in my life is when I become stronger. It is when I see that I am weak. It is when I rely on Jesus for my strength; he makes me stronger in the end. I grow and mature through change and through difficulties.
Paul says that He rejoices in his sufferings because suffering produces perseverance, perseverance produces character, and character produces hope (Romans 5:3-4).
Sometimes I don't want to have hope. Because it seems that when I hope, it gets dashed to pieces. And maybe it is less horrifying to lose something or not get something when you are not expecting it at all. But verse 5 in Romans 5 contradicts this: "And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."
I understand so well your struggle with this. But God...don't you just love those words? But God? But God has a plan for our lives that is amazing and every thing that changes in our lives has a role in changing our hearts so that we can be more prepared to serve him. I am so excited about the way he has been preparing you for all that is changing in your life. He is so faithful. So keep leaning on him Ali and place your hope in the One who has the best plan for your life.
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