30 Letters Day 17

Dear Someone,

Sometimes I wish I never left. But then I look back and realize I wouldn't be me if I stayed. I don't think you would be yourself either. We both have grown in the past seven years. I think it is for the better and I am willing to say that I am glad it happened. God has a plan for you and for me and it is only the best. It scares me to think that someone can be forgotten so easily. No, I will never forget you. But I won't remember you when I eat my lunch, do my homework, or brush my teeth. But I do remember you now. I always will. There are the moments where I cry for you, the moments that I pray for you, and the moments that I smile when I think of you. I can't wait to see you again. I know that when that happens we will begin right where we left off the last time. I love you dear.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 16

Dear Someone,

Sometimes I ask myself why. Why did we become so close right before we were apart? Why did you leave when I needed you the most? But it wasn't your fault. You wanted me to stay. I wanted to leave to prove something. When it finally sunk in I wished I could take it back. But in the end there was nothing I could ever do.

I want to thank you for the hugs, and the times you just listened. I want to thank you for the patience, and your common sense. I want to thank you for your advice and your kindness. Never have I ever treasured twenty-minute conversations so much. I guess it is true that you do not realize what you have until it is gone.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 15

Dear Someone,

When I first met you I must admit that I did not think that we would be friends. But as time went on I began to see that we had more in common than I thought. Over two years we became fast friends. We talked about normal, everyday things. We told stories. We laughed. We created inside jokes. We were silly around each other. We even talked about serious and deep things. I now consider you to be one of my best friends. I feel comfortable talking to you about almost anything. I hope you feel the same. I see us being friends until the day we die.

I can't tell you how often I wish you went to my school, lived next door, worked at my job, or that I had teleportation powers so that I could see you at any time. I miss you. You are such a good friend and I am so thankful for you. I hope that you think the same of me and that we continue to stay in touch even if many miles are between us.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 14

Dear Someone,

I remember when I called you my best friend. I remember when we would make crazy videos and talk forever about absolutely nothing. I regret the day I stopped talking to you. I regret becoming angry about that one little thing. I regret not trying harder. Because I gave up, we stopped being friends. I still don't know what you think of me. Maybe you still think the same as when you told me two years ago. But I guess what you were really telling me is that I changed. And the truth is that I have changed. I have changed drastically. I don't think you have. That is why we grew apart. But I am pretty sure you are happy. I pray that you will find joy and love life. I am no longer bitter.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 13

Dear Someone,

You said you forgave me long ago. But I still see contempt in your eyes. I see the malice and hate of one so far away from real life. You live in your dream world where the planets revolve around you. You drag others in so they will see how you live. You make yourself out to be more than you are and burn those who come to close. That's when they see the real you. After that you block them out and hurt them as much as you can. I know that you have been hurt too, but the least you can do is be a man. Holding grudges brings you down and soon you will fall through the sand. Hurling insults at others doesn't heal you. Just forgive me.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 12

Dear Someone,

You never knew how I really felt about you. You were my almost friend that never really liked me. I did my best to make you like me. But you liked my best friend. I guesd s we were friends. But I never impressed you. You were the "bad" boy and I was the "good" girl. Whoever said opposites attract was dead wrong. When she broke your heart you acted like you didn't care. But I always wondered what you felt inside. Don't you know someday you'll have to face the past?
Do you know the pain you caused when you ran away? We didn't know if you were coming back. You chose the road over your own family. Your addiction made you run wild. You stole your way through life and avoided confrontation. Don't you know that sometime you are going to have to face your fears? Stop running. Just come back home.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 11

Dear Someone,

I wish I could speak to you one last time. If I could I would actually look at you without contempt in my eyes. I would love you like I should have long ago. Only after you were gone did I know who you truly were. You were wonderful and amazing inside and out. I wish I knew you before you had the attack. We would have conversations and deep discussions. I know you were so smart. We could play word games together and I could try my best to beat you. You could read to me and show me your writings and I could do the same. If only I realized what was right in front of me. I know I was young but I should have known. If only I could go back and tell you one thing. I love you.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 10

Dear Someone,

When I think of you I smile. You are so full of life. I love to see your life unfold and I'm excited to see the rest. I miss you now. I wish we talked like we used to. But we can't anymore. I wish I saw you more. But I don't live near you anymore. I remember when we told each other our deepest dreams and wishes. I remember when we laughed and you mercilessly teased me.
I don't care that you aren't reliable. I don't care that you never keep your promises. I don't care if you are hopelessly forgetful. I wish we talked more.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 9

Dear Someone,

I know you are incredible without ever gazing at you. I long for the day I will look in your eyes and know with all my heart that you are the one for me. What is the feeling of being sure? I do not know it. Not yet, my love. But someday I will take your hand and follow you until the day I die. Forever is a word that frightens me. Someday I will not be afraid anymore. You will help me with that fear. Drive it from my hidden soul. I can't wait to not be afraid anymore.
Grow old with me dearest. Take me on walks while we look at the stars. Sit and just hold me while we don't even say a word. Laugh with me. Sing with me. Hold my hand til I die. I'm not impatient for this moment. I am just excited to see you. I wish I could see you now.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 7

Dear Someone,

I don't miss you. I am just fine without you. I don't know why everything that happened actually happened. But maybe we grew from it. Who knows. I wish you the best. I know the best is not with me. So you should just stay away from me. I know I am no good to anyone. Maybe someday someone will prove me wrong. I don't think you realized what you got into when you thought you loved me. It was a ditch dug so deep that when you fell in, it hurt. I know it's all my fault. Just give me the freedom to say that. I dug that ditch. And when you fell, I never helped you out. That is just the kind of person I am. Terrible. Don't miss me. I'm not worth it.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 6

Dear Someone,


I don't know you, but I love you. I don't know what your name is. I don't know your favorite color. I don't even know what you want most in life. I don't care that I might never know who you are. Because I might never know what you look like. And I might never know how you learn or what you love or who you love. But I know this. When you mess up, I'll forgive you. When you cry, I'll hold you. When you fall down, I'll give you a kiss and help you back up. When you say something you don't mean, I will understand. When you run away from home because you just want to do something "bad" to feel like you're really "living", I'll be there to pick you up when you are tired of "living". When your heart is broken, or when you break someone else's, I'll be here to point you to the One who mends and to support you while you heal. When you When you need me, I will be here. I promise.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 5

Dear Someone,

You are so close and yet so far. Sometimes I feel as if I will never reach where you are. I've been told I won't. I've been told it will never happen. I want to give up and die. Self pity is my enemy. I feel bad for myself. I become depressed and talk down to myself. I tell myself I'm not good enough for you. I tell myself I can never do it.

But I want you so bad. I am determined I will have you. If not today, I will tomorrow. The times I persevere outnumber the times I sit and cry. The times I work for you outnumber the times I give up and stare. There is so much I have to achieve in order to get where I want to be. Sometimes I become discouraged. But that doesn't mean I have given up on you. It might take a while, but please wait for me.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 4

Dear Someone,

I know I never talk to you. But you never talk to me. You left when you were just fifteen. I don't think I've really seen you since. Maybe I saw glimpses of your face. But I don't remember. You were gone. We never talked. We never hung out or even saw each other. When I tried, you shut me out. I wrote you letters that you ignored. I tried to call but you were too busy. You made me cry, so many times. You confuse me when you're nice. You upset me when you speak. The grudge I hold against you hasn't even peaked. You're miles and miles away. I don't remember when you weren't. My heart has hardened on this subject. And you don't even know.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 3

Dear Someone,

I miss you more than anything. I miss talking to you and hearing your thoughts. You are not only the smartest person I know, you are the wisest. I miss listening to your wonderful voice; the voice that tells hilarious stories, teases me to death, and breaks into songs from forty years ago.

The past few years we have become closer. But we have also grown farther apart. You are over six hundred miles away from me, in what I call, a foreign country. I don't remember when our last phone call was. I only remember promising to call more and I haven't.

I wish you would tell me things. I wish I knew if you were embarrassed or just forgetful. I hate hearing things from others that you could tell me yourself. But I'm not mad anymore. This is what made me upset eight months ago. I will not hold a grudge again. I promise. I owe you that much.

I love you. I wish you would hold me right now so I could cry in your arms. If I could only have one wish that would be it. And if I were there I would ask you, why aren't you angry like me? Why don't you hold a grudge? You have more of a reason than I do, and yet you don't. I don't know how you do it. But that is one of the many reasons I am in awe of you.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 2

Dear Someone,

I remember the first time I met you. In my mind I had already set you up with my newly made friend. I love being a matchmaker, or at least attempting it. How naive I was at the time of the people's thoughts that were around me. I wasn't even looking for what I found. But I guess it found me.

By the time I realized what was really happening, my head had spun so far around that I couldn't see what was right in front of me. I was so confused by your interest in me that seemed almost nonchalant at the time. I went back and forth in my opinions and feelings so much that I didn't know what my thoughts even were.

But even though I was cynical, I realized you were sincere. It was surprising to no one but me. That is when my head began to stop spinning. That is when I started to fall. I had made up my mind, and yet I was still afraid.

It is only now that I recognize how fearful of life I really am. I wish I were more like you.

Love,

Skg

30 Letters Day 1: my first letter

Dear Someone,

You are not here. I am here and you are not. I feel like I'm fourteen again, trying to find out who I really am. All I know is that I have changed. Maybe you have changed too. Or maybe it's just me. It doesn't matter. I have learned that there is no convincing you of anything. You have your own mind and your own agenda. If I am wrong please stop me now. You have the talent of saying just what ticks me off. It can be the tiniest thing that seems like it doesn't matter. But believe me it does matter. Everything matters to me. I just want to know what matters to you. Stop trying so hard. I know many people who love you and think the world of you. They don't matter. Only One person does. You and I both know who He is. So don't listen to me. I don't matter. I just hope you get where you want to be.

Love,

Skg